In the Middle Ages, it was the wives of British lords who had the title of “ladies.” In today’s world, this word has a broader meaning. A lady in the current world is a woman who can behave decently in any situation, whether it’s a meeting with an old friend or in an elite society. People turn around when she passes and look at her with awe, and even the most avid of cynics and skeptics can’t help but compliment her. Of course, true ladies have little secrets that help them always stay on top. Ultimately, a lady is a woman who commands and gives respect, within reason.
We at Bright Side found out about which details indicate to those around us that they are dealing with a true aristocratic woman.
- A lady can accept compliments, she knows that she is worthy of nice words, and she will always answer with gratitude (a short “Thank you!” is enough) and a polite smile. She will in no instance start a feigned dispute and refute the praise — it could embarrass the person giving the compliment.
- One of the main rules is to look into the eyes of the person you are talking to — no matter whether that is your acquaintance, a relative, a child, an adult, a waiter, or your boss. It is unacceptable to look at the wall, someone’s tie, or other people’s shoes during a conversation. A close look in the eyes will show that she is focused on this conversation, is not distracted by other things, and thus doesn’t allow disrespect toward the person she is talking to.
- Learn proper greeting etiquette, like bowing or curtseying when appropriate. The main rule to keep in mind — in everyday life, outside work, it’s the younger generation that should be greeting the older one first. When it comes to the frames of the work hierarchy, it’s the person with a higher position who should be saluting their subordinates first, regardless of their age.
- When sitting in a chair or in an armchair, a lady either puts their hand one over the other or keeps them “locked.”
- Another important rule followed by a lady that she will never break is watching her posture — both in public and when alone. A straight back and shoulders are her business card in any situation. It also contributes to the good health of many inner organs, not just the spine.
- A lady can control her emotions. You won’t see eyes that are rounded by surprise on her face, nor will you see grimaces of hatred and anger. A grin from one ear to the other is also not something you’ll see a true lady doing. She always keeps in mind that she should be tampering down the level of her emotions: if she is extremely resentful, she can slightly frown. If she is super surprised, she can slightly raise her brows and show her feelings with her eyes. A lady is always collected and calm, while her face and gestures are precise and moderate.
- Her personal boundaries are sacred to her. Breaking them, both personal and physical ones, will not only be impossible for her to ignore, but it will also not be taken lightly. A lady doesn’t tolerate neglect or rudeness toward herself and knows how to politely show to the overly free-willed person she is interacting with that putting their hand on her shoulder or touching her hair is only possible with permission. There is no need to argue or get into a conflict, a couple of apt phrases in a sustained calm tone are enough for the person who slighted her to feel that they have crossed a line.
- Rush and anxiety are signs of incontinence in emotions and thoughts. A woman at her level won’t allow herself to shake her leg, touch a tablecloth, or fiddle with a lock of her own hair. These markers in behavior scream that a person literally can’t control themselves. For her, it’s important to show to herself and everyone else that she is the epitome of calmness, dignity, and patience.
- A napkin taken from a dining table should be placed on the lap, folding it in half during lunch and keeping it unfolded during dinner.
- It’s not forbidden to put elbows on the table. The main thing to keep in mind is that it can be done before the meal or in breaks between the dishes.
- Applying perfume on the skin is a personal process and should be done when alone. It’s better to apply perfume on 2 spots where the vessels are located close to the skin — the wrists, the bends of the elbows, the center of the chest, the temples, the area 2.5-3 inches lower than the earlobes. It’s also important to remember the main rule — everything is good in moderation. Also, keep the “rule of a stretched arm” in mind, which says that the aroma of your perfume should be felt no further than the distance of your stretched arm.
- A high-society woman’s makeup is meant to enhance her natural beauty, not “draw” a new face over the old one. Princess Diana’s makeup artist recommends sticking to natural shades and paying special attention to the tone of the skin.
- It’s better to steer clear of mentioning the names of people and places, including addresses, and limit yourself by sharing general information without details. For example, “I was at the ‘Entrée’ cafe with my friend Rachel,” should be replaced with, “We dropped into a cafe for lunch.” The list of undesirable topics also includes health, politics, and religion.
- When visiting a new country, it’s preferable to dress up in a neutral style and ensure your knees, elbows, and collarbones are covered. To understand what style is acceptable in a particular country, look at their national way of dressing. When communicating with local people, be mindful of the selection of conversational topics and remember the specifics of the local culture — for example, it’s better not to praise Chinese tea in Japan.
- It’s better to wear a minimal amount of makeup when going shopping and remove your lipstick completely. That’s how you will exclude the risk of staining clothes while trying them on.
- If you are traveling by plane and someone is behaving inappropriately onboard and causing discomfort for you or those surrounding you, inform the flight attendant about it. They have a protocol for this situation and are responsible for the order onboard. That’s why it is better to communicate through them.
What other lady-like advice do you have for our readers?